Monday, November 28, 2011

too quiet

Both boys are slightly obsessed with Angry Birds.  When I walked into work today they both were so happy to show me their new stuffed Angry Birds.  Blue and red, of course.  So Master of Disaster was playing Angry Birds with his stuffed bird and using his chair like a building he was destroying.  We also had a discussion about why the pigs were the mean ones if the birds were the ones knocking down the houses.  I insisted that maybe the birds were the bad guys and he said the pigs were.  I thought I had more proof to back up my claims he disagreed.  MofD replied "I just know that cuz I play Angry Birds!"  Apparently that is proof enough.

So it was really quiet in the living and I realized my pancake helper was gone.  Yep that right, we're making pancakes *again* I told you they eat them everyday.

This is what I walked into:


Monday, November 21, 2011

what did you say?

Master of Disaster and I are doing a letter workbook.  We are on the letter "E."  MofD makes the middle line of the E really long and it took up almost all the room on the page.

Me:  Ok make another one.

MofD:  That line "fogged" up the whole thing! Remember he says everything with a speech impediment

Me:  What did it do???

MofD:  It fogged up the page.

It took me a minute to realize that he was not dropping an F-bomb; he was really saying "fogged up."  I don't know why both boys say "fogged up;" it's almost a combination of full and hogged.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

so fancy

On the way home from getting Master of Disaster from school we pull up next to a Honda Accord at a stop light.

Master of Disaster:  Look at that fancy blue car

Me:  Why is is fancy?

MofD:  Because it's blue.

Me:  Oh.  Are all blue cars fancy?

MofD:  Nope. Blue cars with dents are *not* fancy.

Monday, November 14, 2011

promises, promises

 As you read this post, I want you to remember that Master of Disaster is three.  So everything he said was accompanied by his cute little three year old face and said in his cute three year old speech impediment.  And his arms were crossed in front of him most of the time.

Once again, we were making pancakes. I was trying to clean the kitchen before we started and Master of Disaster would not leave me alone.  I kept telling him to go find something to do and I would tell him when it was time to make them.  Finally, I told him top "bugger off"- which I know he hates.

MofD:  You are the meanest Jessica ever!

Me:  barely holding in my laughter  What did I do that was mean?

MofD:  I'm not telling you

Me:  Fine.  Just go find something to do

MofD:  If you don't apologize I won't leave

Me:  What am I apologizing for?

MofD:  I won't tell you

Me:  If you don't tell me what I did wrong then I can't apologize

MofD:  You are being mean.

Me:  How am I being mean?

MofD:  You just are.

Then he wandered out of the room and I could hear him muttering about "being mean" I told him that I was going to start the pancakes.  If you want to help then you need to tell me why you are sad.

MofD:  How long until we make pancakes

Me:  I've already started.  Are you going to tell me why you are sad?

MofD:  I already did

Me:  No you didn't

MofD:  Yes I did

Me:  Well I didn't hear you.  Can you tell me again

MofD:  No.  If you didn't hear me then I am not letting you come back here ever again

Me:  Promise??

MofD:  Yes!!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

can you draw. . .

MofD:  Jess can you draw Huckle for me?

Me:  What's Huckle?

MofD:  He's a cat

Me:  I don't know what Huckle looks like

MofD:  He has feet and a face and he walks

Oh that was so helpful!

this is Huckle

Tuesday, November 8, 2011


Today for lunch I made Fluffanutters.  I know that the boys have never had it, so I made one sandwich just PB&J and one a Fluffanutter and I gave each of them a half.  Master of Disaster was excited to hear that we were having marshmallows for lunch and Whiny Magee (who is a bit picky) was sceptical.  MofD *loved* it and had a very Joker-esque face of PB and Fluff from ear to ear.  Whiny Magee decided he liked it to, much to my surprise.  

MofD:  Maybe some day we can marshmallows with that white stuff with the blue top

Me:  White stuff with a blue top?

MofD:  yeah

Me: What are you talking about?

MofD:  What white stuff with the blue top

Me:  ummmm

MofD:  the stuff that makes turkey sandwiches so yummy!

Me:  Dude, that's mayo and that would be so gross

Monday, November 7, 2011

at least you know your colors

I was making BabyGirl her bottle which is a mixture of breast milk and whole milk (red cap).  The rest of the family drinks 1% (yellow cap).

MofD:  What color cap did that milk have?  Was it yellow?

Me:  no it was red

MofD:  Don't you know that that's apple cider?!

Me:  No it was milk

MofD:  not if it had a red cap!

Me:  It was milk.  BG drinks a different kind of milk than you do.  Does this look like apple cider??

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Not me!

Me:   uh Master of Disaster?  Who's hand is that?

MofD:  It's not my print

Me:  really?  Then who's is it then?

MofD:  Does it look like mine?  Let's see if it matches

Me:  Don't put your hand on that mirror again.

MofD: I don't know who did that.  Maybe the wind did.

man that wind is sneaky

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

if it's *that* important

Master of Disaster:  Jess can I look for something that is "bery" important to me?

Me:  Sure, what is it?

Master of Disaster: ummm. . .it's something. . .uh. . .let me think. . .uh ummm. . .it's. . .it changes colors

Me:  it changes colors?  How?

MofD:  It's a color changin', water changin' car

Me:  Go right ahead and look for

MofD:  you need to look for it

Me:  Um no.  It's not very important to me, so *you* need to look for it.